The Diary of an Assistant Boyfriend: TRAVAILS OF THE FRIEND ZONE (Episode 6)

My name is ADEBISI OLADELE.... Welcome to the friend zone!
The first semester rolled by. The break has come and gone. The few weeks break without Christiana was kinda rough for me. I think it was rough for her too, but we kept in touch well enough, the phone bailed us out. Most times mumsie's credit suffered the brunt! The days rolled by, the break was over in no time. Yes! Your guess is as good as mine, Christiana jumped on me the first time we saw in the new semester. She was on my neck, her legs were off the ground. Those few seconds felt like heaven!
I was at Christiana's room one night as usual. We were in our usual playful mode. She was on her hostel sized bed while I was in her chair. Idiot! Christiana said to me, we both burst into another session of laughter. Stupid boy... Mtcheeeew, this was Christy's usual response whenever I say somethings during our nightly banter and hangout. All these abusive words gan sef, do you know their meanings at all, I said as I picked up a dictionary beside her bed. I sat on the bed with her. I started checking the meanings, in no time I drifted into sleep.
I started hearing two voices, Christy and someone were saying somethings. Jesuuuuusss! I slept off in Christy's room! The figure she was talking with seems familiar, the voice too. Who is that on your bed? The figure asked. Its Dele, Christiana replied. OMG! it's bro Segun, her fellowship and joint Christian fellowship coordinator. There and then I knew my end has come. Dele ke? and I came in he didnt greet me? Dele! Dele! Bro Segun's voice sounded like thunder in my heart... Sirrrr! I managed to answer.
Haha! Christy, what is happening here? Bro. Segun fired the first salvo. Nothing! Christy answered. He turned to me, Dele what's happening? Why didnt you Greet me when I came in? I was asleep ni sir, I replied (how I wished I had said something else). I knew I was in for a long sermon. Asleep? Bro Segun repeated the word as if it was a Spanish word he has not heard before. Were you going to sleep over here? No oooo, I interrupted him. Oh, but you have slept here before abi? Rara o I nearly screamed, which kind yeye sleep come carry me go tonight? What is it by your time? I picked Christy's phone to check the time. Shiiiit! Its 10:15pm, Jesus! I have never been in Christy's room this late! Can your mum call you now and you'll tell her you are in a lady's room at this time? Bro Segun's voice brought me back to reality. I left Christy's room around 10:30pm, of course after Pastor Segun's chastising sermon. I still laugh anytime I remember that day!
Dele, ao far with Christy nah? I see say dt girl dey gbe sun mo e (give you greenlight) but e be like you dey run, you no too dey like touch am. Why? Sanmi asked in his tipsy state. Boys were just upstairs jonzing with a bottle of ponchè rum. No mind the guy jor, I no know why he dey slow the package, all of us sabi say that girl like you, na you just dey dull yourself ni, Lekan chipped in as he gulped his drink. I walked up to lekan, I collected his cup, poured myself the drink. I laughed, na una sabi ooo... Wether she like me or not, I no sure. I gulped the drink, just give me two weeks, I'll see what I can do bout her.
Two weeks! Let the scripts begin to play.
To whom it may concern: this is mostly a pure work of fiction... You think i m writing bout lagbaja n tamedo... OYO is your case.. Or worse worse... Call police!
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