The Diary of an Assistant Boyfriend: TRAVAILS OF THE FRIEND ZONE (Episode 1)

My name is ADEBISI OLADELE.... Welcome to the friend zone!
Hey Christy, wassup with you?. I had noticed from afar her swollen face as a result of crying . What's wrong with Christianah? Why would she be crying in an auditorium filled with hundreds of students... Of all places.. Hian! I walked up to her, raised her head because she had laid it on the table in front of her. I was met with tears. Seeing christy in that stage shocked me. Take! I offered her my face towel and i asked her to go home without asking anymore questions.
I kept on thinking what or who could have made her cry like that? I was kinda worried about her. Wait! Before y'all start painting pictures and getting ideas, I and Christianah at that time were pure enemies! Chaaai! You Cant imagine! Christiana practically hated me. This is it, she has this small stature that did not correspond with her age (she is 4 years older than I am). I used to have (still have) this bad attitude of picking on and making jest of people. Chaaai! Dele loves whining and frustrating people. Christiana was definitely a prey for me, anywhere we jam peren! She knows her own af done for that day niyen. She avoided me like a plague.
I checked her that afternoon but she wasn't at home. I got lucky after my second attempt at night. I walked into her room. It was a mini sized room just like her stature, small and concise. Christy how far... So wapa? I greeted her. She was seated in her chair reading. I'm fine, mi wapa (she is a lagosian) she replied coldly. Without wasting time I went straight to business...Why were you crying in the auditorium this afternoon? I asked. Hmmmnnnnn... She sighed deeply, without uttering a word, she opened her bag, she brought out her 8-in-1 university notebook. She opened the book only to bring out a sheet of paper. Take! She said as she stretched the sheet of paper to me. I collected it with trembling hands and a heart beating fast.
I unfolded the paper and there it was staring at my face! The cause of christy's tears. Her result! Nah she is not pregnant. Our university entrance exam results were released that monday morning. I checked mine that morning too, I narrowly crossed the cut off mark. It was a mixed season of emotions. Some leapt for joy while some cried because their dreams of being University undergraduates later that year has just been shattered! Christiana belonged to the latter category.
Jesus! I screamed as I scanned through her result. She was just a mark short of our expected cut-off mark. I became weak. I felt for her, I found it difficult to imagine that christy will be parking her load home after pre-degree. Hmmmmnn I sighed deeply, for the first time in a short while I felt compassion. Christiana, I called her. This time the tears have started forming in her eyes, they flowed freely down her chubby cheek without hinderance. I placed my hands on her shoulder, With my heart beating fast I turned her head towards me and i bent towards her, hell no.. I didnt kiss her (O ye pervert minds, Jesus is coming soon) I cleaned her tears. The gentleman in me just got activated!
I was short of words, I didn't really know what to say. I have not been faced with a situation like this before. For your information I love talking, in fact I can say I am an orator. I talk with confidence, its impossible for anyome to out-talk Dele. I was (and still is) a pro most especially when it comes to yabbing and picking on people. Here I am now, the pro of talk is now short of words, the speech has failed the orator. This is serious business, not the usual street yabbing I am used to. I sat down in the chair with her... I rested her head on my shoulder, patiently waiting till when the words will come.
To whom it may concern: this is mostly a pure work of fiction... You think i m writing bout lagbaja n tamedo... OYO is your case.. Or worse worse... Call police!
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Twitter: @churchBOI_SZ